Subject: Jen wellness update #39 (24Oct00) That May Wedding in Full
Jen's been taking a steroid (boo, hiss) to alleviate the swelling in her tongue and neck. It seems to be working. Whilst she's still not speaking, there is definite improvement.
We scheduled another party for the weekend (Bay Area invitees only) and its looking good for us to be able to keep it as scheduled.
If we have a postal address for you, then you may have received our "Wedding Announcement" by now, so I thought I'd tell y'all about what happened at our "Legal Wedding", back in May.
We felt discriminated against (in the classic sense of a minority interest) because of Oracle Corporation's strict policy on shared medical coverage. Oracle only extends medical insurance to non-married partners if you are gay! Oracle will accept an affidavit of domestic partnership from same sex partners, but not from opposite sex partners. seemed ironic to us, as we happen to live three blocks away from Castro and 18th - dubbed by guidebooks "the gayest intersection in the world!".
Soooo, when Jen's medical coverage from a previous job expired we were in a bit of a bind - obtaining medical cover as an individual (rather than a corporate employee) is difficult and expensive here. After some thought we decided to do the legal paperwork for our upcoming marriage in secret. And, in California, you can do exactly that. You can be married with no witnesses, and not have the certificate on public record, if you've previously been living together.
It's a two-step procedure, go to City Hall and sign papers, then come back two days later to swear an oath before a judge.
So, morning of May 9th, we popped into City Hall on the way to work to do part I. We stood in line ahead of a couple of small children. Actually, it was a couple aged about 20, but they seemed *far* too young to be getting married ..... Then filled in a couple of forms, and went to another desk to make the appointment for part II.
The clerk said "Oh, there's been a cancellation, so you could do it at ten-thirty". We weren't prepared for that! We looked at each other, said "Ok" to the clerk, and half an hour later we stood on the balcony inside the rotunda of City Hall, observed only by the small children-to-be-wed, and the judge.
Even though we'd approached the event as "just the legal paperwork", we did feel like romantic runaways. After our ceremony, we sat on the steps of the dome, and watched the children be wed. We took a photograph for them, and they of us. The judge wished us all well, and disappeared.
We still had some time before Jen had to go and see a client, so we took a stroll round the Civic Center area. We passed an antique store, and bought a "Golden Hours" electrical clock as a memento, then had early lunch at an oyster bar. The waiter took photos of us, and thought is was dead romantic to get married in secret.
And, as far as I know, we both kept our promise to tell not a soul, save for administrative people unknown to us personally.
Anyone want to spill any beans? Jen's never been particularly good with secrets - did any of you know in advance?
Next couple of mails are photos.
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